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Asscrackistan
Capital Cable City
Population 45% less since 2003
Languages Asscracki
Government Psychological Despotic Regime
Legislature Homicidal Assembly
Head of Government None
GDP -$345,000,000
Currency Camel Poop
Human Rights None



Asscrackistan, a major country in Central Asia and the main producer of fecal oil. Also home to rabid donkeys, giant nerd spiders, and land whales. The barren surface is covered with landmines and also unexploded ordinances that were planted by the Soviet Union in the 20th century.


History[]

In the very beginning of Asscrackistan, the tribes argued about everything from goats to women to chickens. One of their biggest arguments involved goats. 

First, there was goat taxation by the Kings and princes. Then the King of Asscrackistan made a law that required all goat owners to pay for the upkeep of the goat gods.

In the later centuries, they adopted a primitive form of socialism in which the King divided the goats into shares based on the wealth of the people. 

Then they divided the chickens into shares, then the tools of production, and finally the land, then the water.

Early Modern Era (The 1500s-1900s)[]

Then the 15th century came along and Europeans decided to try to colonize the country.

They tried to do this by introducing feudalism which was a complete failure because they were already practicing a form of feudal socialism.

However, by the 1600s they introduced imperialism and in the following century, they started the real revolution and expansionist policies that brought the nation to its current state. 

The Asscrackistani of today is a socialist totalitarian state with a terrible economy and a horrible case of national suicide.

The 20th Century[]

Then in the early 20th century the European put sanctions on Asscrackistan for not doing enough to protect its citizens from the Great Repossession crisis where the economy tanked and the goods were repossessed by the World Bank. 

They also tried to introduce a form of European capitalism which is characterized by boring details and explained by using two cows. 

A person has two cows. One cow produces milk and one cow produces butter but the European capitalist government divided the cows into shares and the citizens got one share of milk and one share of butter the government also introduced a tax on milk and butter which is used to support the poor.

Then the government also taxed the milk and butter so the people had to pay taxes for milk and butter twice. 

The government also introduced a tax on a person who owns more than two cows which are used to support the poor.

The Asscrackistani people are currently in their third year of suffering from the great financial crisis.

However, the economy is slowly recovering, and people are being forced to become more capitalist in their lifestyles the government started a series of oil privatization measures to boost the economy and reduce the nation's financial burden. 

The privatizations failed because foreign billionaires tried to invest their money in the country but the government's policies did not allow that.

However, the government is trying to revive the economy by reducing the interest rates and making the banks more flexible, and giving them the freedom to make more loans. 

However, this changed when the Europeans started to travel to Asia and conquered their land.

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